“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
—Psalm 34:18

Grief Isn’t a Detour

It’s okay that this hurts more than you thought it would. Because sometimes grief feels like it tears the ground out from under you.

One day, life is normal, or at least manageable, and then suddenly everything changes. A loss comes, a dream dies, someone you love slips away, and the life you knew splintered.

Maybe that’s where you are today. Standing in the wreckage, wondering how to breathe again.

I’ve been there, too.

There’s this ache no one can explain away, a silence from others that seems to deepen the loneliness. And under it all, a haunting question. Is something wrong with me because I can’t move on?

But here’s the truth, grief isn’t a detour from the life we used to have. It’s part of the journey. Your journey. A unique way you will travel on this path that isn’t like others.

For all of us on this side of heaven, loss is inescapable. The Bile says from the beginning that things went wrong. In Genesis 3, sin fractured paradise, leaving behind a world marred by discord and pain.

Death entered.

Suffering began.

A shadow of Eden’s tranquility remained with the bitter taste of loss and the harsh reality of suffering.

But the story didn’t end there.

Jesus cared about the broken relationship with God and gave his life to bring a new kingdom to earth. One without sorrow and pain.

Jesus felt grief. He wept at Lazarus’s tomb (John 11:35), knowing he would raise his friend moments later, he still paused to grieve. That moment tells us something profound. God doesn’t rush past sorrow. He enters the story. And redeems it.

He’s in yours now.

Working out your salvation through terrible pain and sorrow. That’s what he does. That’s who he is. He’s doing that for you now even if it feels like he is absent.

So, what do we do with grief?

First, your grief is a reminder that life is supposed to be different and that Jesus has redeemed us. We are already redeemed in the heavenly realm and we are being redeemed in the moment, conforming to Christlikeness minute by minute.

Why does that matter?

Hope. I’m unable to put good words to this mystery of hope except to say the idea of becoming more Christlike is appealing to me. All at once I hate the suffering and receive the truth that I will gain the beauty of Christ at the same time.

Second, you can’t fix the ache in your heart, or the heaviness on your chest that makes it tough to breathe.

How is that helpful?

Jesus knows what sorrow feels like. He felt what you are feeling.

Imagine what was in his mind and heart at the moment he thought about the agony his mother would go through after he died.

The pain in his heart right for you is just like that.

Psalm 34:18 says he’s close to the brokenhearted. That means right now, in this very moment, Jesus is leaning into your pain and sorrow.

He is crying with you.

He is angry at death with you.

He wants you to know he with here with you.

Wouldn’t it be great to release yourself to him and watch how he shows up? To bring every ache, every tear, every angry question, and place it in his hands and see what happens.

So, if today your heart feels raw, your hope feels fragile, and your soul feels worn out, don’t pretend to be fine. Just start here: “God, this hurts. And I don’t know what to do with it. I would like to trust that you care, that you’re here, but it doesn’t feel like that’s true.”

Jesus loves your honest words. He knows how to reach your doubtful heart in just the right way for you.

And when he does, and you become aware of him in your sorrow, you will get to know him in a new way that wasn’t possible before your pain arrived.

FOR DEEPER REFLECTION

Matthew 14:30–31 — “But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, ‘Lord, save me.’ Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him…” (ESV).

Where do you find yourself feeling the most defenseless and yearning for Jesus’ help?