“The Spirit helps us in our weakness… the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” —Romans 8:26

What to do with the pain you can’t name

Some pain is so profound, we can’t put words on it.

There are moments in grief when your body aches in ways you aren’t used to. You try to pray, but the words feel hollow. You open your mouth, but nothing comes.

In those moments, when sorrow is so heavy it steals your breath, I feel very alone. The thought, “If I can’t tell anyone what’s going on no one will understand. I feel very alone.

But that’s not true.

The Bible says that God doesn’t need us to ask for his help. He doesn’t wait to see if you can handle yourself alone. He steps in and gets so close to your pain and sorrow that he can make the right words from what you’re feeling and give them to the Father. Romans 8 says, The Spirit helps us in our weakness when we do not know what we ought to say. He intercedes for us through wordless groans.

How does that work?

In part, it’s a mystery. But we do know that the Father, Son and Spirit are one. So, it makes sense that what the Spirit says, the Father hearts. Romans goes on to say, And the Father, who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit. This is good for us because the Spirit prays for us according to the will of God.

Imagine it. If this is true, and God’s word is true especially when we don’t understand it, then how great is it that the Spirit who lives inside us talks to God about us and he prays in the will of God. The good news is what we need most, that we can not name will become ours.

For Deeper Reflection

Psalm 139:4 — “Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely.”

Where do you feel unable to speak today—whether from pain, confusion, or weariness?

Share your thoughts in the comments.